Suffering is not optional.

The worst thing you can say to someone who is suffering is that suffering is optional. What you are implying is that they are choosing suffering. They are not.

What suffering is is a sign, an indicator, a blinking light on the dashboard. It tells us that something needs attention. And it tells us what needs attention.

Thirst is not optional. If you have not had water for a while, you can't just think away thirst.

Same with hunger. And pain. And loneliness.

Suffering increases if we try to eliminate it or ignore it. The body has no other option but to up the ante to get our attention.

What does your suffering need?

Water? Food? Sleep? Love? Another human being? Nature?

Can you give yourself that as you'd give it to a child who's crying?